Words of Encouragement

A Relationship with God

2011-04-14T08:57:00.000-07:00

Genesis 2:18-20

God said, "It's not good for the Man to be alone; I'll make him a helper, a companion." So God formed from the dirt of the ground all the animals of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the Man to see what he would name them. Whatever the Man called each living creature, that was its name. The Man named the cattle, named the birds of the air, named the wild animals; but he didn't find a suitable companion.

This is lovely, absolutely lovely. One Sunday service recently, oone of our leaders briefly talked about this verse, stressing on how God brought ALL the animals and birds to Adam and let Adam give them names. He stressed on how that was some serious time spent between God and Adam, and I absolutely agree! After all, we do have millions of animals on this planet :) At that point, I realized how much God has wanted to spend personal time with us from the very beginning. If God simply created man to live on his own like every other creature, He would not have bothered to spend that time with Adam. It is such an amazing thing to know that God not only would, but wants to, spend time with li'l ol' me :)

Today, I read this verse again. And I realized something else. Now listen and listen good. Read it out loud if you have to: God said, "It's not good for the Man to be alone; I'll make him a helper, a companion." God had decided Adam needed a companion; a soulmate. And being God, He knew VERY WELL who the perfect companion would be. But instead of simply creating the woman and presenting her to Adam, God brought in all the animals and let Adam screen through them (naming them in the process) to find what fits his fancy.

Did you miss it? Is it because I didn't bold it? :)

God didn't just give Adam a treasure, He got Adam involved in finding that treasure. This is like a father who has an idea for a gift he knows his child will love. But instead of just getting the gift and directly giving it to the child, they go on a hunt for it together. They spend time together, they go on an adventure; it's fun, it's exciting!

But the child doesn't find the gift. Adam didn't find that suitable companion. So guess what Daddy God did - He put His child to bed and created that gift while the child slept. And when the child woke up,what a surprise he got. What a surprise! Read the following verses - Adam was delighted to finally have his treasure.

My point here is, when it comes to OUR personal relationship with God (yes, it is a relationship, not just a religious event!) - and this applies for everyone - He KNOWS what is best for us and He KNOWS the desires of our hearts. And as Eve was a suitable companion for Adam, God also wants to provide us suitable treasure. But He doesn't want to just give us, as we often ask for it. We're so impatient; we just want everything to be done for us or given to us immediately!

Listen - God would rather spend time with you on an adventure of life, letting you dream and learn and have fun along the way, than just drop a gift at your feet.

YES, He tells us He has treasure for us, so that we may get excited and hopeful. These are ourDREAMS.

YES, He brings us on hunts and trials, so we may learn to overcome obstacles and overlook the things that are just not that important. This is our EXPERIENCE and WISDOM.

YES, He lets us go through disappointment, so we may truly appreciate the wonderful surprise He has in store for us. This is our REWARD.

Come on now. Is God not wonderful?

Watch Your Tongue!

2011-03-05T09:46:00.000-08:00

Eph 4:29 [Message version] says, "Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Sayonly what helps, each word a gift."

The NIV says, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."

I admit, this is something I still struggle with sometimes. Something I have learned over the years is that I have a gift of encouragement - this means, encouraging comes quite naturally to me; I love to say things that makes people feel good about themselves or what they do [of course, it's got to be worthy of encouragement. I will not encourage someone to shoplift or hurt others, for example] or give hope to someone's situation.

This ability to encourage comes from the ability to speak, but with the ability to speak also comes the ability to curse. These are two levels of cursing that I know of:

1) Obvious offensive / hurtful words. This includes foul mouthing people, spewing angry words at people, literally calling a curse upon people, bluntly putting people down, etc.

2) Subtle offensive / hurtful words. This includes making fun [teasing] of others, making light of a situation they may be in, (jokingly) calling them names or titles that really aren't appropriate, etc.

I've been guilty of both. In my walk with God, I have learned to throw out the first level of cursing and a portion of the second level. Admittedly though, there are times that I must still watch my tongue. The main area I need to do it in is making fun of others.

Oh Merr, does that mean we can't have a little fun? What a killjoy, what a spoilsport.

I'm not saying we can't have fun! There are many ways and many times I've had joking around with my friends. We laugh about it, we love it, we enjoy it. What I AM saying is to be wary and watchful of the degree of teasing we do or participate in. It's fine, it's good even, to do things all in fun, but once someone starts feeling uncomfortable or attacked, or if multiple people are ganging up on them, or if it is clearly not healthy for them to take so much embarrassment, are we to continue doing it?

I just stressed on the subtle level of hurtful words, but I think it applies even more so to the obvious level. If it is important to watch the way we talk in subtle, less abusive ways, then it is all the more important to watch the way we talk that OBVIOUSLY upsets others! Do you know why? Because Proverbs 18:21 says, "The tongue has the power of life and death..." This means what we say has the potential to build someone up or tear them down. It has the potential to help someone make something of their life, or crumble into depression.

Maybe it sounds far-fetched to you. But you never know how much your words affect someone because you're not them, and they might not tell you. This is why watching the way I talk is such an important matter to me. It's absolutely vital to speak words that encourage, strengthen, build up, benefit, bless and help others (or even yourself - you achieve nothing by looking down on yourself or beating yourself up), because I don't know about you, but I don't want to be the one who causes someone to feel hurt, offended and condemned that might follow them or bring them to their very destruction.

Police v2

2011-02-28T17:01:00.000-08:00

Has it truly been one and a half years since I've written in a blog? It's quite astounding that writing blogs has not even been remotely part of my life for such a long time. I've been receiving spam on my posts and ignoring them all, until I received a comment on my most recent post that didn't have a link on it and stated that the person appreciated my blog.

Thank you, whoever you are. Thank you because it's reminded me of the power of a good encouragement, even if it's just 6 words long.

It's interesting that my last post talked about my police ministry. I'm glad I wrote that post down a year and a half ago - it marked the start of my ministry, so now I can remember when it all began :) I haven't done anything huge or radical since, but I've been steadily moving. LAPD, LASD, CHP - I'm still at large and still pumped with the passion Jesus has given me. And as long as He wills me to, I will pray for you and encourage you.

Police

2009-07-21T22:48:00.002-07:00

I'm going to try to tell this story without making it too long-winded. Let me start with a brief explanation of what I call my "police ministry".

This "police ministry" is the starting of a tiny little mission I have where I want to let police officers know that they're appreciated. It may sound somewhat strange, but it's a desire that I now believe God put in my heart to bless law enforcement.

Here in Los Angeles, I met a fantastic person whom I respect and appreciate. He, too, is in a police ministry and has enabled me to take my ministry a step further (so now we are standing together in it) by giving me books to give to officers together with my thank you notes.

Enough history. This is what's gotten me excited today:

I was on my way back home when I reached a red light at an intersection. The car on my left was, you guessed it, a police car. I grabbed one of the books I had been given, opened my window and held the book outside the window (which I now realise might have been a dumb idea, but I needed to be quick because of the traffic light). I made a nice loud greeting and asked if I could give them the book; explained to them that my motives were just to appreciate their services and that they'd find a note of appreciation inside. BOTH officers took one.

Dang cool.

God is good, though very, very random. I've been asking for opportunities despite knowing it was hard for Him to give me any because I stay at home most of the day (yes, my fault). But He gave me that chance tonight and I'm glad I took it!

I must admit, I am ecstatic. Though I can't be sure if either my words, actions or the book I handed to the officers blessed them tonight, that sure was my intention. They will be in my prayers tonight, for sure.

My God, My Shepherd

2009-06-10T10:46:00.001-07:00

I am at a loss for words and expression because of the awesomeness of our God. I open my mouth to give praise but all I can do is stutter in amazement.

I think God is laughing at me.

In Ezekiel 34:11-16, I so adored the way God promised how He would personally search for His lost sheep (people). While reading Ezekiel, y0u might assume that He is only talking about Israel but if you really read these verses, you’ll see how relevant they are to us today!

11 I myself will search for my sheep and look after them.

12 I will rescue them from all the places where they were scattered…

13 I will pasture them…

15 I myself will tend my sheep…

16 I will search for the lost and bring back the strays. I will bind up the injured and strengthen the weak.

This is exactly what God does today! He is forever seeking us out, personally, and when he does find us (or rather, when we allow Him to find us), He stays so true to His promise of providing for us, tending to us, healing us and strengthening us!

God wants to be so personal with us, but many times we don’t comprehend.

In v23 and 24, God also says that He will place over them one shepherd, my servant David, and he will tend them; he will tend them and be their shepherd.

The shepherd was written as God’s “servant David”. Literally, that sounds preposterous because David’s not around anymore, yet God said it. Then I realized that the term "my servant David” could very well mean someone from David’s line. Many, many, many years later, Jesus comes from David’s line and totally, perfectly fulfills this.

Can this, I ask, possibly be simply the work of scholars and authors? I find it impossible because there is no way that even the best minds could have “created” a story 66 books long and been able to sync them so perfectly with one another.

This is the Word of God.

I the LORD will be their God, and my servant David will be prince among them. I the LORD have spoken.

Hope over Hardship

2009-05-28T12:12:00.001-07:00

If I may, I can summarize Jeremiah and Lamentations into a sentence: they talk about the cause and effect of the fall of Jerusalem and all of the Israelites for that matter. The books are filled with anxiety, fear and worry. Sounds depressing, doesn’t it? Yet, in the midst of such, God is still glorious.

In Chapter 3 of Lamentations, the author writes about himself and his own hardships. Clearly his years haven’t been very good ones, yet in verses 19-27, he speaks the amazing truth.

¹⁹ I remember my affliction and my wandering,
the bitterness and the gall.

²⁰ I well remember them,
and my soul is downcast within me.

²¹ Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:

²² Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.

²³ They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

²⁴ I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."

²⁵ The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;

²⁶ it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD.

²⁷ It is good for a man to bear the yoke
while he is young.

This is how I read the author’s words:

So many things have happened to me – I’ve experienced so much hardship; so much pain and suffering. I live my life aimlessly, feeling empty, feeling lonely. No matter how I run or where I go, I find myself travelling in a circle, always coming back to the same torment. This is what I remember, this is what I live in, and it makes me depressed, distressed and drained. I could easily say right now, that I’m done; finished.

But I know something that keeps me going, that is hope in my God. I know my God’s abounding and unconditional love; I know His ever-lasting compassion and I know His never-failing faithfulness.

I need to hope in my God, to trust Him and seek Him. For He works for the good of those who love Him. I will wait for the salvation of my Lord and I will persevere through this time of trial so that I may triumph through God and with God. I need only to remind myself daily that the Lord is my portion, my provider, my deliverer and my banner; therefore I will wait for Him.

The Lord is my God

2009-05-21T09:37:00.000-07:00

I realize that previously I wrote about Romans and I’ve suddenly switched to Jeremiah. It may seem odd but God has been revealing much through Jeremiah and I’d like to use it to bless others. This post is a follow up of Jeremiah 29 I wrote about yesterday.

Recently during a service, while we were talking about good times, bad times; peace and hardship; joy and sorrow, we were encouraged to always reflect everything back to God. Everyone runs the risk of walking away from God; no one is invulnerable to losing the faith somewhere along the path of life. It’s hard truth but it’s truth all the same. But that is why we need to always remember who we are and who the Lord is in our lives. What the Lord revealed to me that night was simple but impactful:

The Lord is my God.

In Jeremiah 30 v10-11, God says:

I will surely save you out of a distant place,
your descendants from the land of their exile.
Jacob will again have peace and security,
and no one will make him afraid. I am with you and will save you.

And in v22,

So you will be my people,
and I will be your God.

When I read this, I remembered what God had reminded me, that He is my God. And through anything, He remains faithful and His love is ever-lasting.

Don’t keep in question why hardships still happen to us though God promises peace and security in v10. Further down v11, He also mentions discipline for us.

Hebrews 12 speaks of how hardship is like discipline and discipline isn’t pleasant but it trains us toward peace and righteousness!

When we endure hardship, I am confident that God does not allow us to endure more than we can bear, so that we may persevere and become even closer to Him. Ultimately, whether through promises or peace or easy or hard times, the Lord is still our God.

If we’re walking a straight and smooth path, the Lord is the One who kicks aside stones that may stumble us. If we’ve fallen into a deep pit, the Lord is the One with strong enough arms to lift us out.

Exile and Restoration

2009-05-20T09:29:00.000-07:00

God revealed something I wasn’t exactly looking for this morning, but I’m glad He did because I feel it is such an encouraging word for anyone.

During the time of Jeremiah the prophet, Jerusalem was besieged by the king of Babylon, Nebuchadnezzar and a number of Judeans were exiled to Babylon.

As I read Jeremiah 29, I felt that the Judeans were in exile in more than 1 way. They were:

1. Distant from God,

2. Distant from home,

3. Distant from peace.

We can imagine while they were in Babylon, they probably felt anguish, worry, confusion, fear, uncertainty and/or sorrow.

Perhaps, in the same way, we may be going through trials where we’ve distanced ourselves from God, people we love and who love us and from peace of heart and mind. Perhaps we may feel like the Judeans in exile; one or a whole mess of their emotions.

Despite the fact that the Judeans had forsaken God, He knew His promise to His chosen and remained true to it.

Likewise, God chose every one of us who know Him, or at least, knew Him at a time. And for those He chose, He’s made special purposes and promises. For the Lord says:

“For I know the plans I have for you; plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart. I will be found by you and will bring you back from captivity.”

Rest assured, God knows and God loves us. Whether we are going through a challenging time or not, know that God has better things in store for us. He is forever faithful and standing by our side, so that the moment we call upon Him, we will find Him and He will bring us close to Him.

Cookie

2009-05-20T01:54:00.000-07:00

If our life is a cookie, the crumbs are the pain and regret we leave behind because Jesus Christ has made us a whole cookie again

Testing Windows Live Blog Updates

2009-03-11T10:55:00.001-07:00

Windows Live has this ultra-cool feature where I can update my blog without going into blogspot. How cool is that? :)

Amazed..

2009-01-21T13:07:00.009-08:00

I have been working on The Purple Book (Biblical Foundations) for devotion and am currently on the chapter on discipleship. I haven't even finished the chapter but I'm too excited over something that has happened repeatedly and I felt it could be good for people to know.

Recently, I decided to take note of what I learn during devotion. My methodology was to write a WORD for the day, then the LESSON from devotion and the COMMAND or ACTION to apply in my life.

So yesterday, the word I received was discipleship and the action was to obey Christ's teaching. It may sound hard, having to remember every command and detail and so forth each day. It sounds like having to memorize a rule book and play the game. But what I learned today made things much, much simpler.

Today's word was crucifixion and that is, being crucified with Christ. Don't get riled up or run off yet; at least listen to what I have to say for the next two lines. Being "crucified" simply means to "die" or put off old, undesirable habits (I am confident every one of us has some of these) and live a new life in Christ. Here's a popular phrase on how to live a new life in Christ: What would Jesus do? (WWJD)

How often do we realize that by living a WWJD life, we are already obeying God? The math is simple: Jesus is the perfect example of how God wants us to live. By asking WWJD in our lives and applying the answer, we're already living how God wants us to live!

Upon this revelation, I said, "But God, Jesus is different! He is You in the form of a man; He had more power to overcome than any normal man on earth!"

And as God has done so many times before this, He said to me, "Isn't that why I gave you My Holy Spirit? He is your guide, counselor, guard and source of power. However incapable you as a person are, you are capable with My Spirit."

Once again, I am revealed the awesomeness of God's ways. I gotta admit, He has every detail thought thoroughly; every loophole filled.

I am amazed by Him.

Incredibility

2009-01-14T13:07:00.020-08:00

Today, I was overwhelmed by the incredibility of God! This book, the Bible could not have come from simply any man or any hundred men cracking their brains together because it’s like a puzzle that fits perfectly. I have a vision that gets rather confusing and I’m attempting to write it down in words in hope that you may understand what I see.

Let’s start with this: Yesterday, I learned that the Word of God not ONLY = The Bible but also = Jesus Christ who = God who = the Creator of all the world and universe. Therefore the Word of God was present before earth and way, way before books and writing. If you didn’t understand that, to sum it all up: the Word of God is God Himself.

Today I learned that God’s Word isn’t simply about authority and commands. True, while it ultimately is that, it comes with love and benefits. That’s what makes Jesus (remember God’s Word = Jesus = God) so special. To love God is to obey Him. Obedience can seem like a burden sometimes (like performing chores or running errands for our parents or bosses. Especially bosses.). But the obedience God expects from us is different because He knows that in obedience, we will benefit; we will be rewarded.

And here’s the thing. Obedience sounds scary. It sounds like work; it sounds difficult to do. But in anything, what do you ever accomplish by not getting up and moving? Realistically, to lounge all day means to get nothing done. Though we do have to get up and get going, we’ve nothing to worry about because God has given us the easiest way towards this obedience. He has:

1) Given us the Bible
a. Which ultimately are His words.
b. He deliberately made it into black and white print (throughout the course of humanity)
so that it becomes easy for us to access and understand.

2) Given us the Holy Spirit
a. Which ultimately is Himself.
b. In His promise, we are given the gift of the Holy Spirit when we repent and are baptized
in Jesus Christ. The Holy Spirit is our guide, our guard, our counselor, our power.
Simply put, the Holy Spirit keeps us on track in our walk with God.
c. “On track” means that He is the one who teaches us to obey God, by speaking through
our hearts, minds, consciences and in any other way possible. It’s almost like we don’t
even have to try.

At this point, I wonder if you’re starting to understand what I have seen today. I guess what I’m trying to say is God really is perfect and He created; He IS His Word that is perfect. While God asks for our obedience, it’s not because He wants to rally subjects to worship Him. It’s because He loves us and wants the best for us. That great love and mercy, though He is sovereign and authoritative, is why He deserves that worship. When God asks for our obedience, He doesn’t take pleasure in watching us struggle and suffer on our way toward it. That is why He made it as easy as possible, by providing us a source of help for our minds and our hearts (the Bible and the Holy Spirit, respectively).

What I’ve mentioned is only a puny portion of what the Word of God has to offer and already they tie up together perfectly! I’m just summing it all up now:

God wants obedience so we can prosper. We want to be successful in life and the best way is obedience towards God. In the end, both parties look toward obedience for the same result. In other words, it’s like two parties working together for a common goal. As if things couldn’t get any better, God has provided us signposts that we can turn to for help on our journey to obedience. It makes things easy for us, and we learn to obey: God’s happy, we’re happy.

It’s like a fairy tale but it’s real.

Test Video

2008-11-15T23:39:00.003-08:00

Blessed and Watched with Abundance

2008-11-12T14:03:00.006-08:00

Deuteronomy 2:7
The Lord your God has blessed you in all the work of your hands. He has watched over your journey through this vast desert. The Lord your God has been with you, and you have not lacked anything.

There are many areas in which I am not good at and I could easily brood over them. As I read this verse, I looked at my hands and I reflected not on what I cannot do, but what I can do. I am not multi-lingual but I am given a strong hold on one language. I cannot speak publicly but I am given clear speech. I cannot sculpt or paint but I am given drawing and computer-based talents. I cannot organize but I am given the spirit of serving. I cannot perform miracles but I am given the grace of my God who can.

In my journey, I could easily lose these gifts for the sake of a couple of failures, being overwhelmed by inabilities or the comparison to people with other abilities. But the Lord my God has watched over me in my journey of learning, changing and performing. He has been with me and indeed, I have not lacked anything. For the Lord my God knows and tends to my needs and even my wants.

Have you ever thought of what your life is leading to? What you would do with it? I have. I don't care what I cannot do. I know what I can do and in that, I aim to do it well for the benefit and, hopefully, change in others for a better life. I do not have a particular kind of people to focus on but I do want to witness people, as a whole, live their lives without hurting themselves or others; without beating themselves up and with understanding the amazing life of serving others.

Someone prayed over me recently, declaring excellence beyond other works in what I do. I don't think he was talking just about my drawings. Thank you for your prayer - it is received and appreciated.

-Thank You, God-

Anger Management

2008-09-16T21:38:00.012-07:00

Anger is probably one of the most interesting topics to me, current day. Maybe it's because I've experienced (and still am experiencing) so many kinds of anger, and not just experiencing that but experiencing ways on responding to it.

How many times can and do we get angry a day? We could very well wake up on the wrong side of the bed and feel like we're having a rotten day for the next 24 hours. We could have a day with petty problems like a car breakdown, not finding a (good) parking space, forgetting our homework, computer crashing on us, annoying classmates, rude people... And the problems mentioned are surely petty because they aren't enough to really, actually hurt us. But they can make us angry.

My life, when it concerns anger, can be broken down into three stages: past, past and present.

Anger Management #1
I am easily angered. Flukes, delays, pressure, stress, faults, words.. everything gets to me. I react, I flare up. I frown, I scowl. I swear, I curse. I become silent, I withdraw. I shout, I cry, I blame, I accuse. I spend the next hour in an isolated self-pity party, wondering why the world is against me, why people always fail me, why problems are out to get me.

Anger Management #2
I am fairly easily angered. Some little things still annoy me, some more important matters, but I approach the anger differently. I begin to ignore it, pretend that it didn't even happen. I dismiss the person who angered me momentarily, stop associating with them till the anger wears off and we easily become friends again. At times, I even dismiss the problem or source of anger altogether, but other times I find myself persistently complaining about it.

Anger Management #3
I am still fairly easily angered. But I find that I am angered by things so different from before. My approach has changed too. When someone angers me, I pray for them. When something angers me, I pray for peace over petty problems.

Anger isn't always a bad thing. If we're angry for a right reason and if we respond correctly, there's nothing wrong with it. Anger is just a feeling, after all. It comes naturally, we cannot stop it. See the three different stages of anger I have gone through in my life? It may not apply to everyone, nor is it a statement that I do not anger anymore. Even more so, I admit that every day I encounter, see or hear people, words, attitudes and situations that make me so angry sometimes. Sometimes I become so angry, I feel like strangling someone, breaking something. I feel angry because... because I know it displeases God. Because I know it could work out differently if people took the liberty to choose correctly. Because I am unable to do anything about it.

But you know what? While I know I am unable, I know my God is able. That is why I pray.

If you read one of my previous posts about my encounter with a group of people online, I was angry, so angry with them. I eventually resorted to praying for them, because there was nothing else I could do. Nothing else and nothing better. Who knows? Perhaps my prayer added another brick on their path to knowing God.

When I counsel people who have a horrendously negative outlook on people and life, who use swear words to describe others, who prefer to dwell in intolerance rather than forgiveness, pride rather than humility, I also get angry. But I am not one good with words or persuasion. I am not a miracle-worker: I cannot change their perceptions and behavior with the snap of my fingers. But I can pray for them and that they are enlightened with a life-changing experience that will give them a happier life to live in.

I heard someone say something very inspiring today, about how we can take our anger and change it into something good. What do we achieve, after all, by taking out our anger on someone? Rather, when someone actually tries it, changing the anger to do something good for another is so much more fulfilling. Not very long ago, I wouldn't have believed that.. at all. If you had said that, I would've snorted, turned away and decided that I will treat those I dislike anyway I liked. And I probably would've picked to make them feel bad, to ignore them, to hold a grudge.

But when I began to do something good - pray, forgive, love - I found that it became so much harder to become angry and so much easier to manage my anger. I discovered what it means to have peace in Christ Jesus even in anger.

Anger management. Do you have it?

Difference between Requirement & Desire

2008-09-03T14:29:00.010-07:00

Many months of non-blogging and I have returned with a Word from God that I received today :)

Hebrews 9 & 10 speaks about Christ being the final sacrifice for mankind. We all know that God's law required priests of the past to offer sacrifices to God for the cleansing of the people. Heb 9 & 10 of the Bible makes one point very clear: such sacrifices are no longer required because Christ was the ultimate sacrifice. In other words, when Christ died on the cross, He permanently took away our sins.

On the surface, Hebrews 10 (vs 1-18) looks very much like a repetition of Hebrews 8 & 9. But as I read Hebrews 10 (vs 1-18), God revealed something different to me. He showed me the difference between requirement and desire.

The reason people had to present sacrifices and offerings in the past is because this was required of God's Law for the atonement of their sins. By right, because God's law is absolute, people today are also required to present offerings! HOWEVER... simply because it is required of the Law, doesn't mean it is desired by God.

"Sacrifice and offering you did not desire,
but a body you prepared for me;
with burnt offerings and sin offerings
you were not pleased.

(Hebrews 10:5,6)

Now, God even proved (admittedly, we humans tend to ask for proof of a lot of things) to us that He didn't desire repeated sacrifices and offerings from us. He spared us the trouble by sending down His Son, Jesus Christ, who became the ultimate* sacrifice. Yes, he provided the sacrifice.

*ultimate = final. As in, final final. Nothing can be more final. Eternity final. I trust I've gotten through to you.

TODAY... God doesn't require us to give Him sacrifices, but He desires something from us. He has offered us an undeniable offer: He has provided a way to eternal life with Him through His Son, Jesus Christ. To walk the way to eternal life is simply to confess with your mouth and believe in your heart that Jesus is Lord (paraphrase of Romans 10:9 NIV). This is God's desire: that we take up on His offer and love Him and walk with Him.

That is all He desires.

In times of uncertainness, FOLLOW GOD

2008-06-03T07:36:00.003-07:00

As I read 1st chapter of Colossians tonight, I stumbled upon this: But now he has reconciled you by Christ's physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation— if you continue in your faith, established and firm, not moved from the hope held out in the gospel. (1 Col 22-23)

I am advancing into a new season of my life where I will enter a new culture, new surrounding and new and different experiences. I've said to people before that I don't ever want to move from this faith and what I received back were cautionary words, warning me not to be too confident. I can't seem to express correctly when I speak, but what I really mean by my "declaration" isn't that I definitely won't ever stumble in my entire course of life, but that I don't want to.

Maybe it's hard for other people to understand - that's fine. But I know one thing, as Peter says in the book of John, "Lord, You know all things".. Indeed Christ knows all things of the past, present and future. I don't know what is in store for me, I don't know what will happen along the course of life, I don't know if I will weaken or be strengthened in this faith, but I truly hope that Jesus sees my heart today and knows my sincere desire to walk with Him.

I am shaken by other people's comments but not stumbled. Instead, I will only let such things affect me to the point that I will consider my life and future and pray about them to God and leave them all in His mighty hands.

"Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you."

Truth

2008-05-01T09:02:00.014-07:00

Here are a few things I received from Wikipedia on "Truth":

Ghandi summarized his beliefs first when he said "God is Truth". He would later change this statement to "Truth is God".
~
Alfred North Whitehead, a British mathematician who became an American philosopher, said: "There are no whole truths; all truths are half-truths. It is trying to treat them as whole truths that play the devil".

The logical progression or connection of this line of thought is to conclude that truth can lie, since half-truths are deceptive and may lead to a false conclusion.
~
"it is generally recognized that there is no absolute truth but nevertheless that there are objectively valid laws and principles".

You want absolute truth?

This is absolute truth. Not satisfied? There's a lot more where that came from. In an argument about truth, it is not just my relative opinion because absolute truth is real.

Luke 23:34

2008-04-02T03:20:00.008-07:00

Seasonally, I go to this online chat/drawing game site (it's like an online Pictionary) to have a little fun challenging myself at drawing (as, at my own initiative, I usually draw the same old boring animals). I meet a lot of strange people there, not surprisingly - nice people, rude people, rule-abiding people, rebellious people, polite people, foul-mouthed people, etc.. I've learned to either ignore or leave a room when something less appropriate happens.

Today, as I stepped into a room, I "overheard" a conversation between some people who were talking about someone very casually, very ordinarily. I didn't think much of it at first but as they went on, a word caught my eye. One of them mentioned the name "god". It sparked my interest so I read on and they proceeded to talk about someone whom one of them had met and this person was a mess and has been a mess since his son died.

Here's the case: I knew there were a couple of players on the site that had nicknames involving the word "god" and I assumed, at first, that one of them was the subject of this conversation. But as I continued to read, they were not talking about "a" god, they were talking about God and this son they referred to was God's Son, Jesus Christ.

I had no idea how to respond, so I listened incredulously as they as they not only referred to God as a human-like being, but as someone who was so messed up, so broken over the death of his Son that he had to go to a person for counseling. I can hardly remember what else was mentioned and personally, I am glad I don't remember, because a one-time experience of that conversation was enough to boggle the mind.

I may not remember the details, but I remember what I felt and thought during the time. I was... stupefied. I just couldn't, and still can't, comprehend that I had just sat through a conversation where people talked about my God and were reducing Him to a torn, messed up man who acted like he had no hope in this world. I couldn't comprehend how they casually joked and teased about God and they laughed! They laughed.

I was stunned, literally.. and I was crying, inside, because my God, whom I know is sovereign and all-powerful, the Creator of everything, was being ridiculed by His own creation. Not just rejected, but ridiculed.

I was burned up, I was annoyed, I wanted to shout at them, rebuke them and teach them a thing or two. But someone wise once said, "Father forgive them for they do not know what they are doing". It dawned on me that these people (and they are not alone) do not know God, they do not realise what they do. I don't know whether they acted purposely or out of ignorance, but either way, shouting at them wouldn't have done any good. So I left the room. If Jesus, in the position He was put, had the grace to ask God to forgive those who mistreated Him, I figured I need to learn to be as forgiving as He.

One thing I do know for sure at the end of the day is I know who my God is and what He isn't is a hopeless, crushed man who seeks other people for sympathy, counseling and therapy. He does not talk to men and mourn over the loss of His Son because His Son, Jesus Christ, is risen and living. I know God is self-existent and He does not need us, but He loves us. He does not seek hope, He is hope. And incredibly, despite His sovereignty and power, He is also the grace who loves us and saves us.

Let there be a REVIVAL!!

2008-03-02T05:06:00.003-08:00

This is who I am - one of God's crew. Anybody wanna make somethin' outta it, they gotta talk to The Boss. 'Cuz no one's gotta say who I gotta be besides The Boss.

This is God's grace:

It SAVES us
It JUSTIFIES us
It BLESSES us
It EMPOWERS us
It is SUFFICIENT
It is SURPASSING
It is FREE

Nothing in this world is free, you say? It's okay, God is not of the world.

He is God.

Real World

2008-01-10T00:26:00.000-08:00

Merr is back =)

The "prayer warrior" has not been the best prayer warrior I must say, it's seriously time to replenish my spiritual life.

My world can become so unreal sometimes. My imagination has an ability to transform stories and worlds into movies I watch, books I read, then I got to bring myself back to earth. You got it, I'm rather aloof. Only realized it when my English teacher once wrote that I can be a little aloof at times.

I can release everything I'm thinking, feeling or even everything I'm not thinking or feeling into my virtual world, it's so convenient. My imagination is like a TV set playing endless shows that I like to watch, and guess what? I'm the director.

That's cool. But it's not the real world. It's amazing how many ways in so many areas my life and thoughts and decisions can be split.

Isn't the human brain the greatest?

My discipler

2007-10-10T04:14:00.000-07:00

"I don't simply scold people one.. but I simply whack people =)"

Sharon's the first person in ECF who has irritated me so with her persistence and ways not-understandable to me.

She's also the first in ECF I verbally fought with.

She's the one whose eyes I fear gazing on my work because she is bound to say something.

She's the one who scolded me for being unfocused.

However,

Sharon's also the very first person I ever used the word "jie jie" on.. before that, I didn't even know what it meant.

She's the first I worked in a ministry (ppt) with in ECF.

She ministered to me during Victory Weekend, she took me in and persisted with me as her disciple, she's been so gracious as to tolerate my arrogance and pride.

She taught me humility, focus, efficiency, leadership, patience...

In her own ways, she makes me feel special.

If to be a disciple means to follow and imitate, then I'm glad she's my discipler.

God, thank You for disciplers.

(disclaimer: not that no one else has impacted my life, but note the topic - this post is about my discipler)

MP3

2007-10-09T19:50:00.000-07:00

I have NO idea how this came up, but it was during a discussion about language and nicknames.. and THIS is how our conversation turned out:

Carol Yong says (1:55 PM):
and you,..can be.
Carol Yong says (1:55 PM):
PING PONG!
Merr-Peng !ping says (1:55 PM):
.......
Merr-Peng !ping says (1:56 PM):
IM ALREADY MERR PENG WHAT MORE DO U WANYT
Carol Yong says (1:56 PM):
teeheeeheeeee
Carol Yong says (1:56 PM):
hahahahha
Carol Yong says (1:56 PM):
MERR PENG PING PONG!
Carol Yong says (1:56 PM):
mp3
Carol Yong says (1:56 PM):
:Dhahaha
Carol Yong says (1:56 PM):
hahahahahahahahaha
Carol Yong says (1:56 PM):
hahahahahahahha
Carol Yong says (1:56 PM):
stroke of genius, tht
Carol Yong says (1:56 PM):
hahahahha
Merr-Peng !ping says (1:57 PM):
YOR
Merr-Peng !ping says (1:57 PM):
MP3
Merr-Peng !ping says (1:57 PM):
U ARE SO LAME
Merr-Peng !ping says (1:57 PM):
U ARE SO LAME
Merr-Peng !ping says (1:57 PM):
SO LAME
Carol Yong says (1:57 PM):
i am such a genius
Carol Yong says (1:57 PM):
MP3!!!

LAME JOKE 3rd DEGREE!

Discipleship

2007-10-07T03:15:00.000-07:00

I remember the time when I was clueless about discipleship - every time a discipleship session came around, I was nervous (if I had to share a word or recite a scripture), I was reluctant (because I usually wasn't ready), I didn't exactly like it (because I was nervous and reluctant)

Then as I advanced in my spiritual life, I became used to discipleship. I took it as a routine, as a time of sharing, a time of building, but I remember not always looking forward to discipleship because of the impact of the lessons I'd have to learn each time we had a session - due to my short-tempered-ness, pride and arrogance, it was.. hard! I recall a lot of anger, irritation, rebellion which came to the point of much undesired verbal disputes and resulted in nights of guilt.

Now, I'm not saying discipleship is bad! Let me finish. Note I mentioned, due to my personal issues, discipleship was hard. Contrary to how I used to feel about discipleship not too long ago, I have learned to not just appreciate it, but love it and desire for it.

So how did I come from boring, frustrating and guilt-trip to appreciate it, love it, desire it?

Well.. could be many factors. Could be I've grown to be more teachable... could be I've been built-up many times in discipleship.. but also could be the discipler =)

Sounds like I'm trying to butter up to my discipler, does it? I will talk about my discipler in the next post haha

I have come to discover and embrace discipleship as quality time spent with people close to me, where we get to share our life experiences, what we've learned, what we heard from God; a place of building character, building personality, building passion; a group where I really feel loved, where we can pray for one another, where things are revealed and we can be sure it will remain P&C.

It's very hard to explain clearly how differently I perceive discipleship as compared to before.. it's so different, I really cannot believe it myself.

I really have no message of moral to my post today, just felt like voicing out my thoughts on the subject (which I normally don't do, voicing out that is). But even so, I hope my post encourages my readers and sheds new light on matters they may not have been clear about.

God, thank You for discipleship.

Praise God!

2007-10-02T06:00:00.000-07:00

Week 11 and the workload of my final project is overwhelming.

So many scriptures come to mind, it's hard to pick just one...

Hebrews 12:5,6 - And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons: "My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son."

Hebrews 12:7 - Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?

Job 23:10 - But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold.

Gal 3:4,5 - Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, for each one should carry his own load.

James 1: 2-4 - Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

James 1:2-4 has always been an "impactful" scripture for me. I am extremely burdened by my work, and for some reason I am rather unproductive in the days.

Sometimes I wonder if I do enough for God? Sometimes I wonder if I'm doing enough at all?

Time is too fast, my progress is too slow. God, Creator of all time, if You would slow down the clock for me, so I could advance a little further, I would appreciate it so..

God, Creator of all creativity, if You would refresh this artsy mind You have gifted me with and provide me with ideas and visions of visuals and media that I could make happen to glorify Your name and extend Your Kingdom, I would appreciate it so..

God, Creator of man, thank You for reminding me of You, Your endless love and faithfulness. Take my hand and lead me through this excruciating final semester to the level of honoring You with my work.

Praise God!

DIVE IN 07 pics

2007-09-17T12:59:00.000-07:00

Coming soon! In the process of editing...

Hebrews 12:15

2007-09-06T04:41:00.000-07:00

If a serial killer wanted to kill you, what would u rather do: kill him or put him behind bars?

This was actually a question a friend of mine asked me. I looked at her, admittedly a little confused, and answered, "In my own opinion, I'd rather put him behind bars."

My friend asked, "Aren't you afraid there's a serial killer out there that could come and kill you?"

Yes I am afraid of a serial killer out there to kill me.

But at the same time, I feel that by killing a serial killer, you may be disposing of one person, but ten more may rise up and you wouldn't even know. What good does it do to kill him? What good does it do to yourself (murder is a sin), to him (he will experience eternal death) and to the rest of the world (who are mostly oblivious of his existence)?

I've heard stories where people have gone to jail, become changed men and come out living new lives! I've heard stories where people in jail have come to find God, repented of their ways and turned to walk with God! And in some places, prisoners actually have honest jobs, which can build them up as well as the community!

I'm not saying all prisoners will turn out as such. Some never change, some become worse, etc. But by being in prison, there is that slim chance they will be changed, whereas people can't "die and change" as someone just mentioned to me.

When I gave my answer, here's what my friend said, "You know, out of 20 people that I asked... you're the only one who said you'd put him in jail."

Wow. If that were true statistics, that 1 out of 20 will send a serial killer to jail, and 19 others will kill him, then how much better are we than the serial killers? If there were 1 billion people in the world, and 19 out of 20 would kill serial killers, then we'd have 950 000 000 000 killers on our hands. That's 950 million.

Even if only 1 out of every 20 people said they'd kill, then out of a billion, we'd have 50 million killers.
Obviously, this is just a hypothetical calculation. But what say if?...

What is your mindset like? When you answer this question, whether you prefer to kill or put the killer behind bars, what were you thinking? Do you know why you answered that? Do you have a reason?

Maybe your reason is not as lengthy and "complicated" as mine. Maybe it's more of so. But the only explanation for my reasoning is because of the wonders I have heard/seen God do in lives of even prisoners - dead or alive! It's really amazing - God can truly do things beyond our imaginations!

Hebrews 12:15 - See to it that no one misses the grace of God (NIV).

Celebrity Craze

2007-09-06T03:53:00.000-07:00

Mel Gibson came to LUCT today for some launching. Sounds exciting but I wasn't very ecstatic about it. He may be a celebrity, but he's still another person like everyone else I meet everyday. Some people joked that I should go meet him and hand him the Sold Out CD and we laughed about it, but I spent the night pondering over that very thought.

See, this is where my perspective comes from: One of my dreams/goals in life is not to meet a celebrity or to hug one or to get his/her autograph or to have pictures taken with the person. Those are great and all, but how much will it impact my life and other people's lives? I could make others excited, but I could also make them jealous. I could be happy for the moment but it will become just another memory in the back of my mind.

What one of my dreams/goals is... is to impact the industry that I am heading into - entertainment! So while I laughed at my friends' joke, my mind began searching far and wild dreams! I began to ask myself questions like: What if I do give Gibson the Sold Out CD? is it possible that through the songs, he might draw closer to God? Is it possible a seed will be sown? Is it possible something will change? If Mel Gibson changes for the good of God's kingdom, wouldn't he be a great influence because of his fame and status? What if this is actually a chance for me to take to start sowing seeds in the entertainment industry?

Sounds impossible? Well, my God is of the impossible. And because I know all things are possible with God, I never stopped pondering.

Eventually I made a deal with God. I told God that if He made our paths cross, I will bless Gibson with the CD. If not, then there really wasn't much I could do. I saw Gibson, but I never had the chance to go close to him. Actually I think I missed a chance by going out to lunch. I felt I should have stayed back and approached Gibson in Wings Coffee.

I can't be sure whether I missed out a great opportunity God sent to me or not. If I had confirmation that I had, I wouldn't be able to express how sorry I am. But all the same, missed opportunity or not, I believe God will continue opening doors for me along my journey. And next time, I need to be sure or those opened doors =)
____________________________________________________________________

I was talking to my classmate who got to see Gibson along with crowds of other students and from our conversation, I could sum up a few points that I feel are important. It's difficult to piece all my thoughts together from this afternoon, so I may not make perfect sense.

Mel Gibson came to Malaysia unnoticed and I think he wanted it to remain that way. If he desired paparazzi, cameras and screaming fans, he would have openly announced his very presence in Malaysia. So when he entered LUCT and staff and fans with cameras began pouring out of the college, I think he became rather annoyed.

I don't mean to speak as if I know him well. There is evidence to show he preferred a quieter welcome:

1. He hid his face from cameras
2. He verbally mentioned that he did not expect a crowd to greet him

And it's interesting how he gets all the attention but his director friend who walked with him today still remains unknown (by most at least)! It isn't because he's directed movies that people "love" him, it's because he's acted. Which brings me to conclude, it's not the person they love, it's just the status.

Key word: celebrity.

A lot of times when people meet a celebrity, they want to receive something - fame, jealous stares, a hug, an autograph, a smile, a wave.. or perhaps steal their clothes, possessions and even hair. Each to his own motive. But not for myself - I wanted to meet Gibson to give him something that might have that slimmest chance to make a difference in his life and the entertainment world.

Perhaps you think I'm crazy, disillusioned, weird... but that's really how I think, no fooling. And I don't care what you think. If this is the dream God has for me, then He is with me, and no one can be against me =)

DIVE IN 07 - Discover a Real World

2007-09-02T06:05:00.000-07:00

The month of August was so eventful! The new semester started, work is already pouring in, but most important of all, August was FILLED with th essence of DIVE IN 07!!

For those who didn't come for DIVE IN 07, I'm so sorry but you'll never realize how much you've really missed! Stories cannot possibly describe how much happened during the camp, pictures worth 1000 words can't come close to giving you the experience of DIVE IN 07! But I will do my best to tell you about the camp from my personal point of view.

Just to make things clear, I'm not coming from the POV of any other camp participant. I started off as a diver (a participant) but eventually became quite occupied with taking photos of the camp (being part of the photography team). So my POV will be the mix of two different angles.

Being a diver was great fun. Wow, meeting my teammates (Team 4, yea!) and working with them, creating cheers, abusing our flag, learning songs and dances - it was all real great! Once I started to get more involved with photography, however, I was a bit more distant from my group (sorry, guys!) and unfortunately, I wasn't able to say goodbye to them personally after the camp ended! Team 4 @ Green Lic Pies, if any of you are reading this, I send my apologies and I hope I get to meet you again SOON so we can catch up!

As awesome as it was to be a diver, I feel being a photographer was even more worth the experience. I must admit, I almost didn't want to be a diver because I had been one in DIVE IN 06 and I really felt like contributing more to the camp! You know what, God is so good because He catered to my wants even though I had never mentioned them to anyone! I helped out in the photo ministry more than initially planned, I helped set up chairs in the hall and I even was given a chance to help set up a game!

Don't misunderstand me - I'm not saying this out of pride that I'm more "important" than any other diver. I'm really saying it out of humility and thankfulness that God was so good to have made use of me in even the smallest areas!

And God is really so wise in how He makes things work out, because by putting me in positions where I was, in a way I obtained the "freedom" to be where I wanted during the events (eg: I could sit at the back of the hall, I could move around to take photographs..). The reason I am so thankful for this "freedom" is because it gave me the liberty to just be there to pray! I believe one of the reasons God put me where I was (besides being able to contribute physically) is because He wanted me to pray.

I hope I'm not going in too deep for you. Let me explain my mind and heart for DIVE IN 07. Before the camp, I was constantly, faithfully praying for the camp, for things to go smoothly, for the place and especially for the PEOPLE. I didn't want this camp to be just any other fun camp for students, but I wanted it to be something different for people to experience! I wanted people to benefit from it, or be blessed by the content of the camp.

During the last week before DIVE IN 07 happened, I fell into a tired state and my spirit was very low. During the camp itself, God revealed that though I had stumbled that week, He was still faithful and still had me securely in His hands! God was so good to explain to me that I had been relying on my own strength and not His, and that is why I had become weak. Then I received a prayer that confirmed what I had heard from Him. So i recommitted my life and efforts to Him and He really showed me the great and unsearchable things that I did not know during the camp! (Jeremiah 33:3)

So what do I mean about having the liberty to be there to pray? I need you to understand that I really believe in the power of prayer. God is so real with His ear always ready to hear and His hand already outstretched to perform wonders and miracles upon the requests of those who love Him! So in the mornings, during services, almost anytime I wasn't snapping photos, I was praying! Like I said, I wanted people to be blessed and receive more than just "fun" from the camp. So that is what I prayed for - that people will be blessed, strengthened, touched by God's love that has so touched me!

And do you know what? It is amazing because through my weaknesses, God shows His strength! I was extremely tired on the 2nd night, and nodding off just about every five minutes. But at the same time, I didn't want to cease praying so I silently, and admittedly distractedly, asked God to keep me focused. Very suddenly, toward the end of the service, I began praying and I hardly knew what I was praying because my mind was still half asleep! I feel that this really was the Holy Spirit of God working in me. As I continued to pray, for no reason at all, I began to cry! Until now, I am amazed because it was unlike any other kind of weeping. I neither knew why nor where the tears were coming from until I felt God speak to me and tell me that He was taking things into His hands now, that He was now doing what He wanted to be done in the camp! It's like He wanted me to rest and I really felt peace and a sense of joy deep in my heart that it made me cry even more.

God really is so wonderful. DIVE IN 07 provided me an encounter with God like no other encounter I've had before. It moved and encouraged me so much that when I joined the IMU students for their morning devotion on the last day and Victor asked everyone: What is the next level for you?, I immediately had an answer. I had not thought about it before, but I believe this is the next step God wants me to take.

After DIVE IN 07, I want to become a prayer warrior for God. "Prayer warrior" is what people have been calling me each time I pray for the college, other people, etc. But I never actually embraced the title until the Holy Spirit filled me on the last night of camp. I believe that if things are out of my capabilities, God can still do wonders in those areas. I believe that when we pray, doors are opened for God to show his glory and power. I believe that each time we cry out to God, each time we present a request, He hears us and is ready to act.

Lord God, nothing equals up to Your love and power. I feel that taking this step to becoming a "prayer warrior" for You will certainly be more challenging than just casually stepping in. I know I will face obstacles but I want to be an overcomer as You have called me to be. So I pray that You hold me close to You and walk with me on my journey. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.

Time flies far too quickly

2007-07-08T04:38:00.000-07:00

Left without any notice, didn't I? =)

I've been in Singapore for the past four days! Holiday with my family, and for the first time in a long time.. I didn't take any pictures on a holiday trip... I haven't been very motivated to pick up my camera, lately..

I was supposed to check out some schools too but time did not permit us to do so... the lack of it, that is.

It is the 8th of July, my new semseter will start soon and before I know it, I will have graduated.. It may seem like I have plenty of time now, but I suppose I really should decide on where to go/what to do exactly after my college days in LUCT are over.. Time flies far too quickly.

I have added Aaron's blog to my links. He's an awesome friend, a talented graphic designer and a strong man of God. Do check his blog out =)

Can we forget the work progress?

2007-07-02T00:45:00.000-07:00

Hi, I'm back

I'm not much of a blogger.. I never have anything to write about.

But since I'm writing now, do visit http://divein07.blogspot.com/2007/07/dive-in-2007-is-here.html ...

Look familiar? Yes, DIVE In is back, and it will be greater than ever.

Never heard of DIVE In? Then, take this chance to check it out.

Bookmark that link and watch for updates - trust me, you won't regret the effort =)

Signing out,
Merr @ Peng

Servanthood

2007-04-23T11:42:00.000-07:00

Steven once said something about learning new things everyday. I agree - life is so full of surprises, some good ones and some rather unpleasant ones..

I may not have been part of Eaglepoint for very long, but I can bear true witness and testify to those who came after me that it does not take very long for one to see how spirit-filled this house and the people in it are.

What do I mean by that statement?

They're really far too many examples to provide, some of which I can hardly remember in detail now, but for one, the heart of servanthood is so present from the very young stages of a baby Christian to the admirable position of Senior Pastor!

Sunday afternoon was a "wow" moment for me. Garrett, Chrystin and I went to Penang Asam House (newly renovated now and very nice, but the new renovation isn't quite what amazed me) for lunch. Because there was no space in the other table with the rest of our friends, we sat at one table near the kitchen, made our orders, and waited lah.

Garrett and Chrystin's food came first, served by one of the staff. As their food was placed down before them, I was thinking who would be serving me my food. So I went into observation mode and I noticed how busy the place was, with customers filling every table and even more lining up way past the counter (for a while, in fact, the line was never shorter than the counter). Then I took note of the few employees (at least at the time) there, the same faces walking in and out of the kitchen, serving customers, making the drinks, taking orders, cleaning tables..

And so I saw my Senior Pastor walking out of the kitchen multiple times to serve people their food, on the side of taking their orders and serving them drinks at the counter. And, to say honestly, I suddenly had this thought that I didn't want him to serve me my food (don't get me wrong, I will explain why in a moment) But wouldn't you know it... only minutes later, he stepped out with two plates in his hand and immediately I knew one of them was mine >_< ... It's not that it was wrong, but I felt rather odd having my Senior Pastor serving me - literally.. not just a simple chore or assistance or a favour. I don't know what anyone else would think, but I felt at that moment that I didn't want him to serve me, I wanted to serve him!

Now THIS is a classic and very clear example of a servant leader! That's right, sorry to disappoint some of you but being a leader is not just sitting back like a tau keh and giving orders =D Pastor Tim's always coming up to people saying things like, "You are the best" or "I'm inspired by the way you guys serve"... Someone should go to him and tell him that! What's more inspiring than someone of a "leader" position lowering himself to the "waiter" position?

Which reminds me.. this was the only time I felt like wanting to work in an eating place.. =)

Virginia Tech massacre - the enemy's works through the works of the world

2007-04-22T12:15:00.000-07:00

After catching up on the Virginia Tech massacre recently on CNN.com.. I now see fewer articles, fewer videos related to it - the sorrow may continue within the community there, but the news needs to present the world with other updates as well.

As I followed up on the case through news videos and articles, I feel angered, disappointed, stunned..

There's alot I can say about the shooter in this incident.. (sometimes I'm unsure whether to call him the suspect or the victim) But I can summarize his condition to be lost... in need... unministered to.. cracked.. slaughtered.. and died..

This guy was cared for by his housemates, he was sent for counselling out of the police's concern, yet among all those people who knew him.. there was not one willing to share the Gospel with him.

I know, I talk big. I don't truly know his background, nor do I know his environment, yet I dare imply "someone did not do their job of sharing the love of God with him". Moreover, I know I can be plenty reluctant to do exactly that due to many factors.

But this is a good example of the Bible's true words saying the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy. One character, driven to madness by the world and his thoughts, simply needs to flip the coin and make the decision to act to take many lives to the grave with him.

I'm slow at acting, afraid I may mess up, afraid I can't do it, but that doesn't mean there isn't a burden in my heart. I'm still asking the Lord to give me the love, urgency and discernment. If it is HIs will, maybe one day I'll finally step out of my blurness and comprehend.

Week 13 Part 2

2007-04-19T06:06:00.000-07:00

Yes.. List of things I need to do by next week

Final Project
1. Background camera movement in Toon Boom
2. Compile and bind journal
3. Search for and find sounds/music for final production
4. Insert sounds and synchronize with final animation
5. Check up on entire group progress to make sure we have at least 80% done by Monday
6.

History
Finish/finalize 50% of history journal (in order to give grace time of two days to finalize entire thing)

List of things I need to do by Week 15:

Final project
1. Finalize final animation for all three members
2. Finish countdown
3. Check on creation of logo and end credits of group
4. Create CD cover
5. Burn animation work in CD

History
Be FINISHED and submit

List of things I need to do by Week 16:

Methodology
1. Box fold
2. Walk Cycle
3. Finalize Stubby
4. Finalize flour sack
5. Finalize tail wave
6. Finalize bouncing ball
7. Finalize balloon

Drawing for Animation
1. Finalize head rotation
2. Finalize body rotation

History
Be ready for final test

I cannot depend on my own strength to finish this, it's crazy to think I can. I pray God will give me a boost to get me through this.

Week 13

2007-04-19T04:52:00.000-07:00

And we're slowly..burning out..

AMD5, here are the Journal and Proposal details:

Journal

1. Story
2. Roughboard
3. Storyboard
4. Character Development
5. Colour model
6. Model sheet (BW), Character line up (Colour)
7. Research
8. Layout
9. Sound (Where you got the sound from)
10. Story Treatment
11. Environmental design
12. Analysis

Proposal

1. Project Name/Title/Duration/Unique Selling Point
2. Production Schedule/Timeline
3. Production line-up (your team, ranks people in your team hold)
4. Proposed budget
5. Proposed distribution plan

Operation: Survival

2007-04-14T15:12:00.000-07:00

I have just come to the realization of how much work I have, and how little time I have to finish it..

Without God's grace, I WILL fail this semester.

I am up at 4am constantly, I barely get enough sleep each day.. I keep myself locked up in my room when I'm not at school or church - keep your distance from me, because I don't want to be bothered while I am working. If I do not get physical literally, you can be sure I my imagination will be running wild.

Reviews

2007-04-04T05:15:00.000-07:00

Wow, I've found a site full of reviews on Happy Feet! I should search for reviews on other movies too.. who knows, some of them might actually come in handy for my history documentation!

Mid-week-11...

2007-04-04T04:11:00.000-07:00

Hornbill keyframs are done, a few more in-betweens to do and that's that - then the actual design of the hornbill needs to be finished =)

Not much progress on history documentation - have been busy with other work. I'm determined to watch TMNT in time to talk about it. I have, however, a Tom and Jerry review for my journal. I've noticed that the Tom and Jerry cartoons that are either storylined, produced or directed by Chuck Jones.. have a far too strong similarity to The Road Runner Show - the character design, the gags, the movements.... Tom and Jerrys done by Chuck Jones are so different from ones done by Hanna-Barbera =P

Trying to study both History and Film Structure notes for next week. *deep breath*..

1 April 2007

2007-03-31T21:31:00.000-07:00

Happy April Fool's Day everyone =) Glad it's a Sunday..

History final project progress: working on the brief history of animation now - will be done by today, I'm sure of it. I've gathered quite a bit on The Chronicles of Narnia, have not thoroughly looked though it - will do so later =)

SOLD OUT is less than a full month away, people =)

And I just bit my tongue.. ouch =(

History of Animation - Final project

2007-03-30T19:45:00.000-07:00

It is the 31st of March, 10.46 am

I've decided on the movies I will definitely work on

2005 - Narnia

2006 - Cars, Happy Feet, Renaissance

2007 - TMNT, Charlotte's Web

I've decided if ever i do not manage to get my progress down on paper, I'll get it done here =)

Steadily paddling down the river, rocking down the rapids

2007-03-25T09:19:00.000-07:00

It's 12am, I slept 6 hours at 4pm-11pm, so now I plan to stay awake to finish some work.

It is clear in 2 Peter, that it is important for me to be on my guard. And I think at this point of time, it is the strongest message I can receive because I can feel the enemy all around me in the day 4 times a week.

It is difficult. But 1 Cor tells me to stand firm in the faith, and it's what I will do.

I've decided to post up some photography assignments of mine from last year =) It's pretty safe now that I've already gotten my results..hahah..

This is Carol's flute - an excellent model, with a touch of orang paper dispersing the studio light

Gorgeous

Max's watch against a piece of wood - wood's desaturated. Effect suggested by my lecturer =)

SOLD OUT Album Launch

2007-03-25T09:05:00.000-07:00

28th April night @ ECF

29th April night @ KDU

Do come - it will be awesome =)

LiveWire Conference

2007-03-18T13:08:00.001-07:00

Okay, I will say a few words about the LiveWire conference since other people have said so much.. and since pictures are supposed to be worth a thousand words, I won't say too much or the post will be too long to read ^^

The conference was awesome, an event I almost can't describe in words. Personally, for me, I think the whole learning experience in different aspects was what made it so great. But let me make it clear, it wasn't just learning photography techniques that was amazing - it was the whole experience, especially the part on encountering God =)

Aha, I've gotten you wondering. Good.

Bwahaha.

Salt and pepper always go well together

Louis Pang demonstrating for us

Now, if you have any hint of respect at all, I'd appreciate it if you asked me before taking any pictures from my blog. You respect me, I'll respect you. Thank you =)

I've decided to post more pics on my blog. I know of some people who want to see them. But some other time.. I have work to do.

A true slogger...

2007-03-16T04:20:00.000-07:00

... but I read cop blogs =)

Week 8 and we're only getting busier.. production time or we're dead meat for our final project. By God's grace, by God's grace..

The LiveWire conference I attended last weekend (9-11th Mar) was awesome - too much so for me to write here... I might give a testimony sometime during SNL, do come =)

5 March 2007 - Morning prayer

2007-03-05T02:40:00.000-08:00

It's Bee Sean's birthday, happy birthday Bee Sean!

Today has been an awful day. It started off okay, with a test during History that I could actually do. Then as the afternoon came, I became tired and sleepy (slept at 4am) and afternoon class revealed how short of time we are in our final project, which set quite a workload on my shoulders and stress in my mind.

I missed the bus at 4pm, which I planned to take home so I could walk to the print shop before it got late and print something that really would have been most appropriate to print today. Maureen was nice to bring me back though, so at 5 pm I made my way to the print shop, spirits lifted slightly knowing that I could get this task done.

At the print shop, I discovered that my Illustrator file would not open, and I had no JPEG copy with me, so i couldn't print it, and that was a huge disappointment for me. So I picked up some things from the art shop and made my way back.

Then I've come to realise that I forgot to say my morning prayer.

Every morning, when I wake up, I feel it's only right to thank the Lord for another day and prayfor the upcoming day. But this morning, I woke up, ate and caught the bus, and forgot completely about my morning prayer.

That probably explains why I am low on stamina, low in spirit, low on patience. The one day I forgot to invite the Lord to be in my life for the day, is the same day things start going wrong and I start losing the ability to handle them and my emotions. That is not what I call a coincidence.

Will your absence make me forget?

2007-02-11T15:57:00.000-08:00

Challenges is something that has been very significant to me for the past year. I say significant because not only do I notice I am being challenged, but I understand the purpose of such challenges and I realise the benefit I get from them. I'm not sure how true it is if I were to say I'd miss them if they went away. Maybe I would, to a certain extent.. but I know that as long as I have this beating heart, I will face trials that are meant to develop me in one way or another.

Now hear this: Two people I know and whom I care for are leaving Malaysia, and though I believe God will reunite us someday, the thought of not seeing them, or talking to them hurts me. I do not doubt God's decisions in bringing them away, in fact I hope and pray that they find the calling He has set out for them while they are gone.

But how long will we be away from each other?

If we neglect to be in contact for a full five years.. will I forget? I fear I will. I don't think I forget that easily, but what if I do? Someone once joked that I would forget that person eventually sometime down the road.. I put on a good face, but inside I felt afraid because I do not want to forget those I love and care for. To imagine that I could be that absent-minded, it gives a platform for the works of the enemy, which is obviously not good at all.

So, if it hurts to see two people leave, how will I bear leaving the whole family? I will be leaving, I hardly think I can avoid that.

We'll see, when the day comes.

A new day, a new experience

2007-02-09T19:34:00.000-08:00

There are many things I have not seen, heard and experienced. But i truly believe that the past few days has educated me on some aspects:

1. The different levels of response to different kinds of events

2. The indifference and lack of interest in some events versus the enthusiasm and amount of planning that goes into other events that are just (or maybe more) as time and effort-consuming as the former

Personally.. I am shocked..

Stunned.

Memories in a lightbox

2007-02-08T04:19:00.000-08:00

As changeable as the weather they say? The weather doesn't really change that quickly. A more appropriate saying would be, "as changeable as how many times one would need to change outfits in Malaysia's weather just to keep comfortable".. (with the exception of Kuching *glowing smile*)

But indeed, as changeable as the weather. I have concluded that the culprit is tiredness. It has always been, it might always be.

But it's okay because even in this state of idleness (which I pray will pass over before the night ends), I remind myself that there are many tasks for me to do, many fruits for me to harvest, and that the year will be a good one when God's will is done.

I do not look forward to next week. Two people I know will be leaving simultaneously, and I do know for a fact that I will not be seeing them anymore for a long time. One longer than the other, and that makes it worse to think about. I never look forward to goodbyes.

But hey.. I get to keep the lightbox.. I shall treasure it =)

Just for the record...

2007-01-27T08:19:00.000-08:00

Lately, it is not often I face this battle that I have grown familiar with. But this time it's a little different. Not much, just a little.

I don't know how much longer I will really think about this - probably not long. But just for the record...

It just didn't feel right.

Maybe it never will.

We'll see, when the Lord's will is done.

21 Jan 2007

2007-01-22T02:02:00.000-08:00

The first day of school has gone.

Progress check...

1. Fresh start in History and Style of Animation 1 class and Film Structure class

2. Catching up with classmates and schoolmates - AMD and ADOM *do* relate with one another!

3. Made a new friend

4. Ran into a few old friends

Progress check?..

Step by step.

2007

2007-01-21T08:38:00.000-08:00

2007 - a new year, a new start, a new vision

Let's go.